Ellena+T’s+Final+AmEx+Speech+2016

__**Title of Speech **__

Appreciating Parents

__**Text of Speech **__

How many of you have ever fought or felt irritated with your parents?

Me too! As teenagers, a time of stressful academic rigor and emotional turmoil, there are many times where our parents get on our nerves, whether it’s about what they do or what they say. Perhaps they’re technologically illiterate, and frequently need our help with their computer or their iPad. Maybe they nag too much, saying things like “Clean your room!” or “Do your chores!” despite you being swamped with schoolwork or extracurriculars. Possibly, they push their opinions onto you, and refuse to listen to your side of the story, no matter how much you argue.

All of these are understandably annoying, and there may be times when we think, “God, our parents suck!”, or even, “I wish I had better parents”. These feelings are normal, as I get aggravated by my parents too. My mom is a neat freak and constantly eggs me to clean my room, while my dad’s mentality during arguments is “my way or the highway”. However it’s important to step back, think, and realize that our parents do these kinds of things for a good reason. It’s not because they want to make us suffer. It’s because they care.

A parent’s role is to guide their children to become independent, functioning adults. Throughout the animal world, animals teach their young how to hunt, eat, and defend themselves so that they would survive on their own. Similarly, our parents teach us life skills, morals, and even self defense in hopes of launching us into the right direction. When we were young children, we looked up to our parents, because they were our source of understanding the world. We learned how to live by absorbing everything they say and by mimicking their behavior. As we grow older, our interests and ways of thinking change from our parents’ ways of thinking because we are learning to develop as independent individuals. That desire for independence causes us to naturally rebel against what our parents are trying to teach us, which leads to conflict. Although it’s infuriating when parents don’t seem to understand us, they nag and lecture because the majority of the time, they’re concerned. They believe that their way is the correct way, and anything beyond that would harm or even ruin our lives. Maybe they’re so harsh because they don’t want us to make the same mistakes that they did, as they were teens once too. We may not like it now, but this is something we learn to appreciate when we become adults, and ultimately parents ourselves. According to the New York Times, a survey site called onepoll.com reported that “the age when the average child gains new respect and appreciation for his or her parents is not 21, but 22. Of the 5,000 20-somethings who responded, 70 percent admitted they’d thought they “knew it all” in their teens, and more than half said they now “miss having their parents look after them.’” This is because as adults, we aren’t under our parents’ rules anymore, but we have to deal with issues like finances, food, relationships and health all on our own; things that our parents took care of when we were children. When that happens, that’s when we truly realize the extent of our mom and dad’s input to date. Also, according to Dailymail.com, the same survey claims that “ More than a fifth of those polled experienced a new respect for their parents after enduring months of sleepless nights, worrying about childhood illnesses, and learning how to become parents themselves.”

So, instead of being annoyed, let’s tweak our perspectives a little bit. The next time your mom yells at you for not picking up the trash, instead of rolling your eyes, think, “A loud voice means she’s healthy, that’s great!” Or when your dad lectures you about the importance of abstinence or something for the 100th time, instead of calling your dad a prude, think “Aww, he’s concerned about me. Thanks Dad!”. If their actions really bother you, ask them to properly sit down and to hear you out. Most of the time, they will comply. Tell them how you feel, and listen to what they have to say as well. Attempting to see your parents’ point of view is very important in maintaining a healthy relationship. Then, work together to set up boundaries, and reach a compromise. If they truly care about you, they will listen and genuinely try to make things work with you.

If all else fails, which is unfortunate, just remember this. No matter what kind of people your parents are, they are your parents. Without them, you wouldn’t be alive and sitting here in this classroom today. It may seem small, but it's a very important thing to be thankful for.

So, I wish to live in an America where we, and future generations after us can all understand and appreciate parents more. I want to see the day where, instead of witnessing toxic familial relationships, I observe healthy and happy bonds between parent and child. And when they grow old and pass away, I hope that we can look back knowing how much we cherished them without any lingering regret.

Remember that they are people too. They're human. They make just as many mistakes as we do, and from time to time, they'll do and say things they'll wish they could take back later on. As I have mentioned before, I get irritated with my parents, but I love them to bits. Without them, I wouldn’t be where I am today. And in the end, our parents are ultimately by our sides. Whether or not we're fighting at the time doesn't change whether or not they love us.

So when you get home today, give your parents a big hug, or do something else to show your appreciation. I definitely will.

__**Sources **__


 * “The Way of Youth” by Daisaku Ikeda
 * [|__http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/01/27/when-parents-stop-being-stupid/?_r=0__]
 * [|__http://www.wikihow.com/Cope-With-Annoying-and-Nagging-Parents__]
 * [|__http://www.shemazing.net/the-21-most-annoying-things-are-parents-do__]
 * http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1122227/Kids-appreciate-parents-reach-22-research-finds.html
 * My own analysis