Sarah+B’s+Final+AmEx+2014+Speech

=No means NO.=

Rape. A word all too commonly used in jokes such as “Man, I got raped by that test!” Rape. A word that is also not discussed in seriousness without the stigma of it being shameful. By definition, rape is the act of penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim. Now what leads up to acts such as rape or molestation? I believe that it is caused by misogynistic views seen in men and the idea that men are entitled to sex. Misogyny is a trait that is all too commonly seen amongst men as they are trained into believing that they are the above women and women are enslaved to them. In light of the Isla Vista shooting, Elliot Rodgers displayed obvious misogynistic views. In one of his YouTube videos, he goes to say “All those girls I have desired so much, you will see…I am the true alpha male.” Now in his manifesto, Rodgers also went to say that he wanted revenge on women for rejecting him because he was 22 and was a virgin athat had never been kissed. What is wrong with this picture? Everything. Because of his idea that he was entitled to sex from the “blonde sluts” on his campus, six people are dead and the country is up in arms. Now people are using the excuse that he had aspergers or was a psychopath, but he was also a man with 4 guns who felt he was not receiving something that he was supposed to have. People also commented on his behalf saying things such as “I am glad what he did, women are destroying this society” or “Advice for women: Whenever a crazy white guy asks for sex, drop the panties and take one for humanity.” No! Just because he was an angry sexless man, he is not entitled to have the pleasure of sex from a woman because he demands it.  This is not the only case of a man taking out his non-existent sex/love life anger on women. Just a few weeks ago, a boy came to school with a knife and stabbed a girl to death all because she said no to going to prom with him because she had a boyfriend. And on August 5, 2009 George Sodini walked into an LA Fitness in the Pittsburgh area and killed 3 women and injured 9. He fired 50 rounds of ammunition at a room full of women because he had not been “able to achieve and acquire what he desired from women”. In our current society, men are becoming more and more violent because of their “desires” not being fulfilled. Out of 71 of the mass shootings in the last decade or so, nearly 68 of them shared one thing in common: a man filled with rage that he was not getting what he wanted from a women. Our society has made it a social norm for men to expect sex and love from a woman. Women are not toys to be played with. Now I’m hoping I don’t come across as some feminist freak, but I am trying to spread the fact that men are becoming more expectant of sex and women kneeling at their feet as if they were a god. Just the other day I heard a conversation between two boys that went something like this, “So what is feminist equivalent of men? Humans, duh.” Now this went on in a classroom and shows just what I’m talking about. Men think that women should not be allowed to stand up for their equality because we are something less than them. Last time I checked, I still had a beating heart and a working brain. Just because I don’t have a penis that is always hard, that does not mean that I am not also a human being.  Now with my feelings that men are becoming to expectant of sex and love from women, what happens when their expectations aren’t reached? In America, 1 of every 5 women is a survivor of sexual abuse and rape. That is not something that we as a country should be proud of. That one person could be anybody: your mom, sister, grandma, daughter, aunt, best friend, or anybody walking down the street. Two thirds of these rapes are also cause by someone that is close to the victim. Now here comes a personal story. My mom is a survivor of rape. When she was 20, she was dating someone from her work and went out with him and her friends. Well it turns out that her boyfriend had made a bet with a few of their co-workers as to who can get her in the sack first seeing as she was still a virgin. My mom has no recollection of the night that she was raped because she was roofied by god knows who. She woke up the next morning alone in a random bed and does not know who raped her or how many. This story now leads to my next point; only 97% of rapists ever see a day behind bars, her perpetrator being no exception. My mother never turned anyone into the authorities because she did not have factual evidence that she was raped by her boyfriend or coworkers. And this is not an uncommon occurrence. In 2010, a female student at the University of Missouri was raped by two men after a night out. She went to the school administration but a case was not pursued. 16 months later she was dead with 100 Tylenol pills going through her body due to suicide  A few years ago, a women working for KBR went to Iraq and was housed with nearly 400 men. She reported to her employer sexual advances made on her by the men in her house but no action was taken to stop the harassment. This eventually led Jamie Leigh Jones to be given a “special” drink with date-rape drugs and to be gang raped. She was given a rape kit (a kit filled with supplies to collect evidence for the victim) and it later mysteriously disappeared. Whoa what a shock! Due to her missing kit, the men who had raped her were not prosecuted and are freely walking around today. Now onto the Steubenville case. We all know the basics of what happened there, a girl was raped by two football players while intoxicated and the vicious acts where videotaped and captured on camera to be posted all over the internet. The two boys accused are star football players in the town and due to their status friends and family members verbally went after the victim online because she “provoked” her own rape. What kind of ignorance is this? She was intoxicated at a high school party. Because she was drinking that does not give two horny teenage boys the right to violate her without her consent, which she was unable to give due to her intoxication. I also want to point out that the two boys in the Steubenville case had “ apologized to the victim by name, as well as to her family and the community. “No pictures should have been sent around, let alone ever taken,” he said.” And that is all he apologized for, taking pictures. Why don’t you apologize for forcing your penis into her while she was unable to know what was going on? Now I want to point out that I am so tired of people defending rapists because of a woman wearing risqué clothes or being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Oh wow you saw my bra strap that means you have to have sex with me? A woman’s clothing or state of sobriety does not give a man the right to force himself onto her. In a speech I read the writer says “men need to stop asking people’s clothing for sex and start asking the people”. This sentence reins all to true to thousands of cases of rape. Men testify in court with the excuse that the female provoked him and seduced him. Really? If you were so seduced go wank off to your pillow or in the shower not to a woman who obviously does not return your desires. Rape is rape and there is no one to blame but yourself. Our society has become to accepting of a rape culture. With songs such a BlurredLlines where a girl is dancing naked and the singer is saying “I know you want it” is okay but the female equivalent is condemned, I say we need a massive slap to the face. Rape and misogyny is not something to be joked about. The guy from Tosh.0 is not allowed to say it would be funny if a girl got raped by 5 guys because she stood up to him making a rape joke. Men should be taught that women are their equivalent and that they are not some toy. And I know that women are not the only victims of sexual abuse, but I am a woman and do not deserve to be treated as a slave to a man for his needs only. The ideals set in our society have gotten out of hand with our rape jokes, our excuses of why a man rapes, or the blaming of the victims themselves. In not only the America I want to grow old in but the world, I want to see men starting to see that women are human beings too. I want to be able to not worry about what I am wearing or doing around men and thinking they could potentially rape me. I want to be able to be confident that our society would not blame the victim but blame the rapist. I want to be able to grow up in a world with people being okay with the word NO.

Time magazine, Jezebel, NY times, RAINN